One-liners...( 2 )

I will keep adding to this list...( because these are my own and i can't produce them all at once.)

1. I am not sure if i is sqrt(-1) or i am sqrt(-1).

2. I am sure that i is imaginary and i am real.

3. If i imagine i in my mind, does that mean i is imaginary or i am imaginary?

4.The Attendance function is defined in the following manner:
f(t) = P, for present
A, for absent
?, for proxy and
0, otherwise

5. Our messing facility. Roti and papad. Each try to imitate the other. They succeed admirably.

6. "Variety is the spice of life!"
Yeah, and routine is the rice of life.

Window Trails......

Oooooooh! This is now a nice proof that my comp is extremely talented at cupping and it even allowed me to take a screenshot of it's miserable performance!

Honestly, I never expected it would not cup while I press Print Scr while it's already cupping there! Weird, isn't it?

The Blabber...

Mr. B (B for Blabber), as will be referred to in that manner hereafter, is a chatterbox, and known to give audio output without any input, which convinces a Communications Engineer that it (his vocal cord) is not an LTI system.

Q: How do you know if B is talking ?
A: He is alive.

Q: How are you dead sure if B is talking?
A: He is awake.

Whenever I have a row with B, I say " Just because you can talk fast and easy doesn't mean you can keep talking."

Do you believe in God?

This is from the movie 'Contact'. At a conference, A,Ellie Arroway (cast by Jodie Foster) replies to a question from B,Palmer Ross( cast by Matthew McConnaughey), in front of the selection committee, who assembled to interview the candidates to select the person to travel in the 'Machine'.
X,Y : Other people.

B:Would you consider yourself...a spiritual person?
A:I don't understand the point of the question. I consider myself ...a moral person.
X:We're sure that's the case, but what Mr. Joss is in fact asking--
B:Do you believe in God?
A:As a scientist...I rely on empirical evidence, and in this matter...I don't believe that there's data
either way.
Y:So your answer would in fact be that you don't believe in God.
A:I don't understand the relevance of the question.

Y:95% of the world's population...believes in a Supreme Being in one form or another. I believe that makes the question more than relevant.

A:I believe...I believe I've already answered the question.

Just a lightbulb jest...

Q:How many Vitto's does it take to change a lightbulb?
A:Before answering this question, I need to know why you blew up the last light bulb and only then will you get a new bulb for replacement. After that you'll have to ensure that the new lightbulb does not blow up because of the same reason, or you'll be penalised appropriately.

What would you call this kind of thing?

Feedback

Look at this nice image I found on the net for feedback.

A Beautiful Kiss

Questioning your morality...

You are alone in a park with a frog and and housefly. The frog is eyeing the fly while waiting in ambush. It keeps stalking the housefly like death. The housefly doesn't know about this potential danger, but you know everything that's going on. The frog's now inches away behind the fly and you are close enough to intervene.

What do you do?

Do you shoo away and save the housefly from becoming the frog's meal or do you abstain from intervention and let the frog satisfy its hunger, therefore saving the frog instead?
What do you do?

This was one of those questions my father posed to me during my childhood.

Holi 2005, Jamuna Hostel

Laugh out Loud!!!!

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 1001 - One to hold it and the rest thousand to turn the house around.


Q: How many iitians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None - They give up screwing it up and connect it to their UPS's.


Q: How many Saarang Co-ords does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Three - One to screw it in, one to make a T-shirt for the event and the third to screw it up.


Q: How many Sarathis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Emma?
Q: How many Sarathis does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Oh! You'll die of Corona! Don't try!
( You must have a lotta capacitance to remain seated in his class, man! )


Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A1: How many can you afford?
A2:( This is a bit lengthy and there is a different post on this, Check out! It's very officially funny. )


In EE Dept. and in E.Engg., you don't understand anything, you only get used to it!


A black spectral dog came into Principles of Communications class the other day, and I thought " Ha! Dogs don't need any CoT to audit the classes in ESB, and after they get in, they won't get if they can get anything or not."


Q: Why did Prof. S.Ponnusamy name his dog, " Laurent " ?
A: Because it left a residue at every pole.

This is not a Weblog!

• If u think this is a blog, slap yourself.This is a blob! If u got the second b confused, how could you miss the first one?

• Nope, not jesting!. This is a blog as well as a weblog.Why would anyone want to have more than one blogs?

Of course, this is my second blog.

• Q: How can a question be an answer?

A: Why can't it be?

• Do u know that always means never ?

Check this out : If I say, " I always lie", it means that I never lie because if it's true, it must be false. So after the common factors cancel each other out you get what women never mean by always : Never

• Nothing is more necessary than the unnecessary.

• Say my name and I don't exist anymore.What is my name?

It is not Tom Lincoln, but it is Silence.

• Everything lost is meant to be found.

• Three econometricians went out hunting, and came across a large deer. The first econometrician fired, but missed, by a meter to the left. The second econometrician fired, but also missed, by a meter to the right. The third econometrician didn't fire, but shouted in triumph, "We got it! We got it!"

( He means they had got it on the average.)